Soulmates are people who bring out the best in youSoulmate or Cellmate?

In last week’s message, we explored the question of how you define love in a committed relationship. If you haven’t already, I encourage you and your romantic partner to get clear on what love means to you and how that plays an essential role in the health of your relationship, especially when dealing with conflict.

In the beginning of your relationship, your partner may have seemed like a dream come true…like your ideal soulmate. But if you’re like most couples, after having more than your fair share of ups-and-downs, you might be feeling more like cellmates.

Yes, it’s completely normal to experience struggles in your romantic relationship. It’s common to sometimes feel like your needs are no longer being met. And, at one point or another, it’s likely that you’ll feel confused about your relationship and its future.

Anybody who’s ever been in this type of relationship knows what this feels like…and it doesn’t feel good! You may feel trapped….or even imprisoned. So what can you do when this happens? How can you free yourself from the cellmate mentality and return to the soulmate mentality?

For starters, it helps to remember…like the quote says: “Soul-mates are people who bring out the best in you. They are not perfect, but are always perfect for you.”

When upset about your partner’s actions, it’s easy to conclude that they bring out the worst in you, not the best, right? After all, if they didn’t do what they did, then you wouldn’t be so upset!

But that would mean that they have more power over you than you do…and that’s simply not true. In any given situation, no matter how upsetting it may be, you have the ability to be your best.

Does that mean you might have to admit that you’re sometimes “wrong” and not always “right”? It sure does! Does that mean that you might need to apologize when you said something hurtful, even though it felt justified at the time? Yep!

These types of actions are inspired by love…from your best self. And the difficult situations that inevitably arise in your romantic relationship are perfect opportunities to empower yourself by making wise choices.

It is when we don’t make wise choices that we end up feeling like we’re stuck in an unfulfilling relationship, and powerless to change it.

You always have the power to make changes! Even if your partner isn’t willing to make changes, you can still change…your mind, your attitude, the way you handle conflict…and much, much more.

If your partner is driving you crazy and you’re questioning what you ever saw in them in the first place, flip your perception to see them as your soulmate…a person who is here to bring out the best in you…and then step up to that plate.

If you want to make the best out of a tough situation, see the conflict as part of what your soul needs for its growth.

If you’ve given your power away, it’s time to take it back. It’s yours to claim, has always been there and just needs YOU to take ownership of it!

Stay tuned for more mindful messages. Giving you helpful tips and exercises to improve the quality of your life and relationships!

With love and support,

Catherine Dietz
Healthy Relationship Coach
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P.S. If you partner feels more like a cellmate than a soulmate, you’re not alone. Many couples feel this way, and there are ways to change this for the better. If you’d like to take advantage of a free relationship strategy session, contact me here. I’d love to help you get started on a plan for healthy changes.