AwfullySimpleNature’s Seasons vs. Human Cycles

Spring has definitely sprung in Southern California! After recently visiting my dad in the midst of snow blizzards in Boston, I was delighted to come back to warm weather and clear paths in San Diego (although, I do already miss him).

One day, I was stuck inside and not able to get out much. And the next day, I was back in the comforts of my own home and grateful to feel warm and safe. I couldn’t help thinking of an analogy between nature’s seasons and human cycles.

How often have you felt stuck inside with no way out?

  • Maybe you’ve been feeling stifled in a romantic relationship that’s not going as you had hoped.
  • Maybe the limiting belief that “marriage is hard work – that’s just the way it goes” has you feeling discouraged from trying to make it better.
  • Or perhaps you feel exhausted trying to accept your relationship for what it is, while knowing deep down it’s not what you truly need and want.

Whatever the situation may be, feeling trapped without an escape route is simply awful!

But the good news is…it doesn’t have to stay that way! Just as nature’s seasons change, so do the cycles of humans.

Nature does it without even thinking about it. It has a built-in intelligence that already knows exactly what to do and how to do it.

And so do you! Yes, YOU have a built-in intelligence that already knows what to do and how do it. If that’s hard for you to believe, consider this:

  • What do you think is beating your heart right now?
  • How are your lungs expanding and contracting?
  • How does your stomach digest the food you eat?

It’s that same built-in intelligence that nature has, and does what it needs to do without needing to think about it. As fascinating as this is, you might be asking: “what on earth does this have to do with relationships?!” Good question!

Stay with me…here’s where I’m going with the significance of this analogy…and how it can help you!

The source of intelligence that enables your physical body to function without your conscious direction is the same source of intelligence that enables you to thrive in your relationships. The difference is, how well you thrive in your relationships IS based on your thinking and how well you train your thoughts.

And to take it one step further…your feelings are also based on your thoughts. So what you’re thinking has a HUGE influence on how you feel. For example, if you’re feeling angry about something, you’re most likely thinking that somebody did something wrong. Why else would you be angry?

And if that same feeling of anger keeps on occurring in the same situation, my guess is your thoughts about it are stuck on replay. This may go on for days, weeks, months and sometimes even years!

It’s time to shed the burden! When a crab grows too big for its shell, it moves into another shell. It doesn’t stay stuck in the shell it was born in, destined to stay small for the rest of its life.

This doesn’t mean that you simply leave a relationship at the first sign of trouble…and then jump into the next one. First, ask yourself if you’ve really applied yourself in trying to improve the relationship. Have you considered professional help? And, if both of these are true, do you need to give the relationship time to adjust to needed changes?

That being said, if you truly feel like you’ve done your best, and you’ve lost all hope for any improvement, then it may be time to let it go and move on. Only YOU can make this decision.

As humans, we are designed to thrive. We are born to grow and flourish and enjoy life! AND OUR INTIMATE RELATIONSHIPS ARE DESIGNED TO BRING OUT THE BEST IN US.

Your instinctive intelligence lets you know whether or not something is working for you based on how you feel. When you first fall in love, it feels SO GOOD because that’s what love is meant to do. And if it’s true love, that feeling will last more than a season.

When you fall out of love, it feels SO AWFUL because the high of feeling loved is lost. The truth is, you are always loved. That built-in intelligence is a source of love, and it gave you life because it loves you.

The tragic beauty of being human is that, unlike nature, we have the freedom to choose how we think, how we feel and how much we want to thrive in our life.

We get to work with our built-in intelligence to create the best life possible. Pain is here to help us grow…to re-direct our path when we’re moving in the wrong direction.

It’s up to YOU to pay attention to the pain you’re feeling and determine how you might be contributing to that pain. If I stub my toe and then keep stepping on it, I am creating my own pain. If I stay in an unhealthy relationship pattern and keep going through the same motions, I am creating my own pain.

This isn’t meant to make you feel bad…it’s meant to inspire you! To remind you how much power you have to change the circumstances in your life.

Just like the trees need to lose their leaves, the snake needs to shed its skin and the caterpillar transforms itself into a beautiful butterfly, you too are designed to grow, flourish and express YOUR true nature.

Allowing yourself to receive support during turbulent times of pain and growth is a healthy choice you can make. We all need guidance with things we have not yet experienced, especially when they’re difficult and not necessarily what we want.

It requires a willingness on your part, and I would love to help you in any way I can on your relationship journey. You deserve to be happy!

Stay tuned for more on the beauty of nature’s wisdom and the lessons we can learn from it.

Also, if you’re in or near San Diego on March 28, I’d love for you to attend my workshop: “Experience the TRUE Love you Deserve”. You’ll learn all sorts of valuable tools for how to make healthy changes in your romantic relationship. And it would be great to connect with you in person!

Love,

Catherine Dietz
Healthy Relationship Coach

P.S. If you’re ready to shed the patterns that no longer serve you, contact me today for your free relationship strategy session.

P.P.S. If you know of someone who lives in San Diego, and would benefit from improvements in their romantic relationship, please share the details of my March 28 workshop: “Experience the TRUE Love you Deserve”.