Sky is Not the Limit Belief System IsIt’s All a Bunch of BS!!

Yes, you read that right. All of your thoughts, your decisions, the way you respond to your life circumstances…it’s all a bunch of BS!

I’m talking about your Belief System, of course! All of us are influenced by a belief system…a series of beliefs based on our past experiences and the ideas and rules that were taught to us as children.

We each have our own unique belief system, but what is true for all of us is that our BS sometimes needs to be challenged in order to maximize our potential.

To illustrate, here’s a simple example: As a child, you were probably taught not to talk to strangers. This belief was a good thing…it was designed to keep you safe.

As an adult, if you never talked to strangers, you wouldn’t have any friends. A belief that was once necessary and helpful is now no longer true or needed.

This month’s theme is about freedom. And your belief system has a huge affect on your sense of freedom.

If there’s an area of your romantic relationship that has you feeling frustrated or restricted, I encourage you to dig deep and explore what’s causing that limitation.

It takes courage and strength to accept this type of challenge and only you can make that choice. So before I move on, ask yourself if you’re really willing to examine the integrity of your current BS (Belief System).

Are you ready? Okay…let’s do it!

If you really want things to change, an open mind and a willingness to change some of your beliefs is key in this endeavor.

Most of the time, people confine themselves by the limitations in their heads. By stepping back from the stories you tell yourself, you allow yourself to see where you might be unintentionally limiting your own capacity to love and to feel loved.

This isn’t about brainwashing you…I’m simply going to share some powerful ideas that may challenge your comfort zone in the current state of your relationship.

Your comfort zone feels safe because it’s familiar and you know what to expect. But if you’re comfortable in a relationship that you don’t truly want to be, you are cheating yourself out of true love, joy and freedom.

Romantic relationships are designed to bring out the best in you, not the worst. So let’s start examining how you can identify the BS that’s holding you back.

This week, I invite you to dedicate some uninterrupted time to work on an exercise selected from Louise Hay’s book, You Can Heal Your Life:

  • Grab a pen and a piece of paper.
  • At the top of the page, write “I SHOULD”.
  • Now, think about your romantic relationship and make a list of five or six ways (or more!) to finish that sentence.

For example:

  • I should learn to keep quiet about what’s bothering me.
  • I should put my partner’s needs ahead of mine.
  • I should just learn how to deal with my struggles.

There’s more than one part to this exercise, and here’s where the juicy stuff comes in…where you might start seeing your own limitations. After you complete the first part:

  • As you read each of the things you SHOULD do, ask yourself “why?”
  • Write down a second list with your reasons.

For example (continuing from the original list of “I SHOULD” examples above):

  • because my partner already has too much on their plate to deal with.
  • because I want them to feel loved.
  • because everybody has to do that.

Your answers will reveal to you what you think your limitations are and where you might be stuck in your beliefs. This is great! It’s the beginning of a huge awareness that can empower you to make some positive shifts in your way of thinking.

I remember the first time I did this exercise. It was a huge eye-opener for me!

And now…the best part. You get to finish this exercise with a feeling of power and choice:

  • Go back to your original list of items under “I SHOULD”.
  • Re-read the list one item at a time, except this time, start each sentence by saying “If I really wanted to I COULD”.

For example:

  • If I really wanted to, I COULD keep quiet about what’s bothering me.

Followed by gently asking yourself “Why haven’t I?”…and write down that answer. For example:

  • Because I’m tired of stuffing my feelings and I need to speak up for myself!

Do you feel how empowering that is?! When you give yourself a choice, you are giving yourself freedom. When you SHOULD on yourself, you are creating a bunch of BS that will create a big stink in your life.

You deserve to speak your truth and to be honest with yourself and your partner.

You deserve to create your own beliefs that work for you, instead of simply following someone else’s rules.

You deserve to feel free!

Stay tuned for more mindful messages on how YOU can create more freedom in your romantic relationship.

Love,

Catherine Dietz
Healthy Relationship Coach

P.S. If you have a friend who would benefit from this message, please share it by clicking on the platform of your choice below.