Personally, I think this is because women are taught to put themselves last.
As a woman, you have most likely been conditioned to think that taking care of yourself is selfish and that you should be putting your partner’s needs, your kids’ needs, or even your employer’s needs ahead of your own.
If you’re constantly taking care of everyone else’s needs, and never checking in with yourself to see what you need, how do you even know what that need is?
Or maybe you do know what you need…time with friends, a workout at the gym or some alone time with a journal or good book…but never follow through. Are you stuck in a never-ending cycle of taking care of everyone but yourself?
I am not advocating that you stop taking care of your kids, showing up for work, or supporting your partner, but I am encouraging you to make yourself just as high (if not higher) of a priority as them. You are no less important than them, and you too deserve to be supported!
When you commit to making yourself a priority, you’ll begin to trust yourself more. You’ll begin to recognize that you don’t have to just go through the motions of life and that you actually deserve to get your needs met and experience joy!
Commitment and trust go hand-in-hand. What exactly does this mean?
When you committed to your romantic partner, you both trusted that you would be there for one another, right? And if one or both of you has/have failed to keep that promise, my guess is that trust has been lost.
So when you commit to making yourself a priority, recognize that that commitment is just as significant! When you make a promise to yourself, follow through.
If things change, and you need to make a new commitment, that’s fine. But if you keep failing to follow through with your self-care, you will lose trust in yourself.
What do commitment and trust mean to you?
To me, commitment means:
- making a well-informed choice to do something and then doing it
- supporting myself with things that will help me follow through
- honoring the obstacles I meet along the way, and making adjustments as necessary
For example, after struggling in a romantic relationship for a long time:
- I made a commitment to find clarity on what I needed to be more at peace about the relationship.
- I supported myself by journaling about my feelings, and I looked to experts to help me move away from confusion, and toward hope and empowerment.
- I honored the fear and anxiety that came up from the idea of losing this relationship and what that would mean to me…and him. And I allowed myself to feel those emotions fully and move through them, instead of stuffing them down.
As I did this, I was amazed at how quickly things started to shift for me. I began moving away from the internal conflict and stress of not knowing what to do, and I started to feel much more peaceful and confident.
I was still scared of what may or may not happen, but I was learning to trust myself so much more and that made me feel so much stronger…and better!
To me, trust means:
- being honest, even when it’s not easy
- respecting whatever emotions come up, even when they feel yucky
- being there for myself as I would be for a good friend
There’s more to it than this, but this gives you an excellent starting point to start defining what commitment and trust mean to you. With these clear definitions in mind, you can operate from a place of clarity and begin establishing trust in the relationship with yourself.
Implementing these ideas and tips on how to trust yourself more will also help you trust the process of life more. Once you learn how to trust yourself, your potential is unlimited…in your relationships and in your life!
Trust me…I am a woman who learned how to recognize my self-worth and stay true to myself in my relationships. And it is an honor to support you in doing the same!
Healthy Relationship Coach
P.S. If you’ve missed any of my prior messages and helpful tips, click here for easy access. Make this a form of support that you can prioritize for yourself!
P.P.S. Have questions or comments? Would you like to talk with me one-on-one? Please contact me – I would love to connect with you!